I knew this moment would come sooner or later. Luca, our son, is a very strong-minded person. And he announced several times in the past that he would not join us on this journey, but would rather stay at home in order to play with his friends. But yesterday, it was the first time that he cried himself to sleep. I deeply felt his sadness and sorrow, because they are mine, too. Reality starts to kick in. I feel like I have been hit by a train. Or rather: I jumped. And the water IS cold.
I always was a fast decision maker. My picture for the way I handle major decisions is: Jump from the springboard and see how cold the water is later. It is the same with WakingDream: I know the experience of our long journey will be enriching for all of us. But I also know that leaving behind the good life we have here is quite a price to pay. That goes for me and Luca, anyways. We are the ones that love our routines, our social contacts, Bern and the quarter we live in. We are the herd animals. It is different for Marian and Lou. They are less attached to people and places. Which is a quality I wish I had right now.
These last two months in our apartment and our known surroundings will be stony for half of our family. Ironically, summer has just started here – the season we (i.e. the two of us) enjoy most, swimming in the Aare river, going to the public pool around the corner, and playing with the kids down on the street. And that is even before we started packing things up, deciding what to take with us and what to put into storage, and leave this place for good.
In the end, this is what letting go means. Who said it would be easy?